Today is a good day. I was given the chance to talk to my beloved last night for 8 mins & 24 seconds. He was just allowed to call and tell me he was doing ok, he loved me, and that he needed me to take care of a few things for him and pray for his missing glove. After that phone call I finally got some rest. I woke up at 5:30 this morning and when I looked at my phone I had a missed call from him and a missed text. I was devistated. I was told last night was his last phone call. I guess while in processing they do not know when their last phone call is until Monday when they get taken away. I was so upset when I saw that I missed his call. I tried to call back, but I knew I would not get him, he had already been processing for at least an hour. I am praying for another call tonight. They are so comforting. He was pretty upset about this glove that he was issued and is missing. He asked me to pray for that because he was going to get yelled at because it is missing. It is sad and quite humerous. He did not ask for any prayer but for that glove. I know he is hurting though, just like me. The text I got broke my heart and I wish I could go back in time and be awake when he was to comfort him in that time. It is sweet to know that even though I cannot, someone is, my God. I can only pray for his peace, protection, and contentment in this time, he cannot find comfort in me. I cannot take the hurt away, not from him or me, but God can provide comfort to make it through. That is a sobering thought. I feel I am doing well today. I had a really hard time yesterday when I got off work. I realized it would be the first time going to Curtis without my beloved and I couldnt stand it. I ate in my office, what I had an apple and oatmeal, because I did not want to eat alone. It is silly how something like that can make your whole world crumble. My world shattered yesterday. I finally got the courage to move and I headed to church. I sat in the parking lot for quite a while before I could get the strength to go in. I finally got out of my car and made my way straight for Pastor Bill's office. I did not pass go, I did not collect 200 dollars, I just had a mission- to make it to his office without crying. I did that and when I finally got there and I saw him I lost it. I am so overjoyed by their friendship. They sat with me all last night and just talked to me about anything but what Tim is going through...well a little about that...but they just laughed with me. It felt good to laugh. It was the best thing anyone could do for me. I have such a special place in my heart for that family and Tim does as well. The Lord has been so gracious in providing them. The Lord has been so comforting and that is so sweet. I am so glad that I have a God that already knows my thoughts, my pain, everything, and is guiding me through it. No one could do that for me, not even Tim, just my Lord. I am so glad I have a God that loves me so! I pray for Tim's strength and comfort in this time. I pray that he clings to the cross no matter what and loves the Lord regardless of the circumstance. I love my Timothy and I cannot wait to marry him. Come February 4th it will be 7 months away! AH! I cannot wait.
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